So it's safe to say this has been an absolutely insane summer for me. Pretty normal compared to my other friends summers but still insane for me, both in terms of personal life and work life. This being said I thought it would be a good idea to have a look back on this summer before I start my final year of university and think about things I would have done differently or things that I'm really proud of doing this summer.
Coming into this summer I wanted to steer clear of relationships or dating anyone. I'd just broken up with someone I really cared about, and stopped seeing this guy that I also cared a great deal about but messed it up. I felt like I needed to stop the whole dating scene and focus on myself. Yeah... that didn't go too well. I mean, I only really dated one person who majorly messed me about twice, first by effectively cheating on me with a work colleague and the other by having a massive go at me for no reason. I have tried to close myself off from love as much as possible. There have been people I've really fancied and wanted to go on dates with but I've refrained from doing so. I've been so closed off to love because I was so scared of being hurt again and I kind of just wanted to focus on myself and not worry about what someone else was thinking or doing. It's my first summer in about three years where I have been single so it's been interesting to say the least. I've been happy single though, for the first time in a long time. I have really enjoyed being single. A new miracle for myself which I am actually quite proud of. I guess we'll have to see what happens when I get back but I'm not looking for anything, just seeing how things go as such.
This summer has been an interesting one in terms of work, I found out in the second month of being home that there weren't going to be that many shifts going around at my tutoring job and because of this I needed to get a new job. I looked around at a bunch of different places, applied to a few and the first one that got back to me was Guildford Spectrum doing a coaching job for a kids club. Perfect for me and I have to say I've really extended my skill set by taking the job. I've been trained in so many different things that I never would have been trained in previously and I feel like I took to the job like a duck to water. It took me a couple of shifts to get into the swing of things but I really enjoyed the time I spent there and the children that I met. I was constantly praised for working so hard and being really good at my job which made me feel awesome. I was so worried beforehand about not fitting in or not doing good enough and I feel like I proved myself wrong and I showed that I could do something brand new and be actually quite good at it as well.
I would say that I massively swamped myself with work though. Especially the last few months of the summer. I ended up working three jobs at one time which was a major strain on me. I would pretty much work a 6-7 day week depending on my schedule. I would come home from one job, either my tutoring job or coaching and then jump straight into my student ambassador job meaning I would work more than 8 hours each day. When I did have time off I was online doing work for the university. I'm not complaining about it at all, this summer has given me an amazing opportunity to grow and develop, but I feel like I did take far too much on and overworked myself to a certain extent. I haven't really had a proper break or a time where I've sat around and done nothing. That's what I'm going to be doing for the first few weeks back at uni before Freshers starts. At least I know I've earned a lot of money and had fun (most of the time) while doing it.
I have been finding it really hard to be back home the last month or so. I feel like I've got a little taste of freedom by living by myself at uni and learning how to look after myself. I feel almost like that all goes away when I come back home and I lose all the freedom and independence that I had while I was in Wales. I hate having to tell my mum where I'm going or what I'm doing, when I'll be back and if I want dinner. I kind of want to just come and go as I please and not worry too much about other people's plans. I try to keep myself to myself and steer clear of everyone as much as I can, but it's not always possible which is annoying. Sometimes I just want my own space but I can't really have it. No one knocks before coming into my room, they just barge in. This summer has made me want to move out more than ever. I feel like it's time for me to be more independent and I can't imagine living with my mum and my brother when I come back after summer. I want to leave as soon as possible.
I have had a really good summer in terms of hanging out with friends and making new ones. I haven't had as much time as I have had previously to hang out with my friends but it means that the time I do manage to hang out and see them is so much more precious. I've narrowed down my friendship group to only those who I really care about and want to see, and I know those friends really care and want to see me too, which is always lush. We all have such different schedules but we manage to fit each other in and I've had such an amazing time hanging out with them this summer.
I go back to uni in a couple of days and I have to say I cannot wait. I'm so ready to have my own space again and get back into studying. I've really missed Wales and all of my acting family. They all mean so much to me and I cannot wait to see them all again. It's been a long time coming.
I would also like to take a moment to remember those who were tragically killed in 9/11. It may be fifteen years on but the victims deaths will never be forgotten, nor will the sacrifices of the emergency services involved in dealing with this tragedy. I was only five when this horrific incident occurred and it is something that has stuck in my memory forever, the whispers of the teachers in schools, the gasps and hands over their mouths. We are still at war with terror and who knows if we will ever win, but those people who lost their lives will never be forgotten.
Stay awesome.
I would say that I massively swamped myself with work though. Especially the last few months of the summer. I ended up working three jobs at one time which was a major strain on me. I would pretty much work a 6-7 day week depending on my schedule. I would come home from one job, either my tutoring job or coaching and then jump straight into my student ambassador job meaning I would work more than 8 hours each day. When I did have time off I was online doing work for the university. I'm not complaining about it at all, this summer has given me an amazing opportunity to grow and develop, but I feel like I did take far too much on and overworked myself to a certain extent. I haven't really had a proper break or a time where I've sat around and done nothing. That's what I'm going to be doing for the first few weeks back at uni before Freshers starts. At least I know I've earned a lot of money and had fun (most of the time) while doing it.
I have been finding it really hard to be back home the last month or so. I feel like I've got a little taste of freedom by living by myself at uni and learning how to look after myself. I feel almost like that all goes away when I come back home and I lose all the freedom and independence that I had while I was in Wales. I hate having to tell my mum where I'm going or what I'm doing, when I'll be back and if I want dinner. I kind of want to just come and go as I please and not worry too much about other people's plans. I try to keep myself to myself and steer clear of everyone as much as I can, but it's not always possible which is annoying. Sometimes I just want my own space but I can't really have it. No one knocks before coming into my room, they just barge in. This summer has made me want to move out more than ever. I feel like it's time for me to be more independent and I can't imagine living with my mum and my brother when I come back after summer. I want to leave as soon as possible.
I have had a really good summer in terms of hanging out with friends and making new ones. I haven't had as much time as I have had previously to hang out with my friends but it means that the time I do manage to hang out and see them is so much more precious. I've narrowed down my friendship group to only those who I really care about and want to see, and I know those friends really care and want to see me too, which is always lush. We all have such different schedules but we manage to fit each other in and I've had such an amazing time hanging out with them this summer.
I go back to uni in a couple of days and I have to say I cannot wait. I'm so ready to have my own space again and get back into studying. I've really missed Wales and all of my acting family. They all mean so much to me and I cannot wait to see them all again. It's been a long time coming.
I would also like to take a moment to remember those who were tragically killed in 9/11. It may be fifteen years on but the victims deaths will never be forgotten, nor will the sacrifices of the emergency services involved in dealing with this tragedy. I was only five when this horrific incident occurred and it is something that has stuck in my memory forever, the whispers of the teachers in schools, the gasps and hands over their mouths. We are still at war with terror and who knows if we will ever win, but those people who lost their lives will never be forgotten.
Stay awesome.
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